rumorsmatrix_

Today, I haven't really got a specific post in mind, but I'm trying to write and journal more, so here goes.

I suppose the main thing I'm feeling right now is tired. Physically, a bit, but more sort of mentally and emotionally.

I finished a big project today at work. I don't want to go into the details, because I try to keep my work fairly anonymous online -- I work for a small e-commerce company doing devops; that's enough detail -- but I didn't feel happy or accomplished or even relieved to be ticking off complete a big job; the planning poker points "scored" feel (are) completely meaningless, and I only felt, well, nothing. I've been working on it back-and-forth with my manager for weeks now, and I just wanted it to be done. Didn't care if it was done well, or on time, or used nice clean code, or implemented some nifty trick. Just bored and frustrated and it was a slog from start to finish. And now it's done. Tomorrow there'll be something else.

My beloved ginger cat, Archie, who has been my "ginger best bud" since 2013, has gone missing. Despite the best search parties, Facebook group posts, and alerting all the neighbours, if I'm being realistic, he's been missing long enough now that he's not coming back. I know there's discourse about not letting domestic cats outdoors (though I gather it's less of a contentious issue here in the UK than in the US). He was old, and never spent much time outdoors; content in his later years (he was getting on a bit) to just sun himself in our back garden and then come back inside. Then one day he went out and hasn't come back. It's been... ten days. We can't find him. He's chipped, but, no alerts.

I realise I just wrote most of that paragraph discussing him in the past-tense. With no definitive answer one way or the other... There's no closure. Maybe he'll come trotting through the cat-flap any minute, demanding his dinner. Probably he won't. He had a good, luxurious life, and was well-loved. That's what I'm concentrating on.

Warcraft has definitely hit a lull; I've basically no need to play the pre-patch event anymore, and no desire to continue the regular Dragonflight weekly stuff either, so I've been reading. I finished Ringworld (Larry Niven; a re-read for a book club) the other day, and started The Left Hand of Darkness (Ursula K. Le Guin). Ringworld I didn't much rate (I know, I know, it's a classic, just one that I personally don't think has held up that well), but The Left Hand of Darkness I'm enjoying. The bookclub meets to discuss Ringworld on Sunday morning, so I'll see how out-of-whack my opinion is then. Maybe I'll post some book reviews of book club books?

Okay. I've mentioned my big-two thoughts of the moment (work, Archie). I think that's enough for now.